nyc, baby! baby = art and the blog is born.

well hello, adoring fans...

i can imagine that some of you wonder how baby became the blogging phenomenon that she is. well, here is the story behind it:

daddies km and j took me to the metropolitan museum of art. daddies are cheap and didn't want to pay my admission fee. i don't know what the men at security desk's problem was when they found me hiding in daddy km's murse, but they gave us funny looks and said, "we won't even ask." how rude!

first we went to roman statuary. i wanted to pretend i was a statue. statues are cool. while daddy j was taking my picture, another rude security guard came up and yelled at us. he said that i shouldn't stand so close to the statue. so i moved away and the minute the guard turned away i flipped him the bird and moved closer again. nobody tells baby what to do!

"defiance, in profile."

then we went across the room to take more pictures. ANOTHER security guard yelled at us from across the room. they are some uptight at the met! it was at that time we realized our mission to take pictures would need to be more covert. special agent baby, operation: insubordination.

"big head series #17."

so then we went upstairs. we were wandering around for about an hour when a security guard approached us. what the fuck is it now, i wondered. he asked, "are you doing an art project?" we had no idea what he was talking about. "you were taking pictures of the baby downstairs," he said, pointing at me. "everyone is talking about it. word travels fast."

it was at this moment i realized that i had achieved celebrity status. people were whispering, "who's that?" and "what is she doing?" and they were whispering it about me wherever i went. people can instinctively tell that there is something special about me, that i am not like other babies.

"damn straight," daddy j told him, "this is an art project and baby is our muse."

"ooohhhh!" he exclaimed. "she's so beautiful! i want to see more!" he then gave us carte blanche to do whatever we wanted for pictures, as long as we didn't use a flash. what a nice man after all, my very first fan!

"little head series #32."

so that afternoon, i decided that baby was too special to be put in a corner. i decided that it was my responsibility to blog my adventures for those less interesting than me, because i care about the little people! i have so much to give, and that way people can read all about me and see my pictures.

it wasn't an easy decision. i am sacrificing much for fame. take my privacy, for instance. people write me all the time, they want to know who i hang with (only cool peeps), where i go (the hottest spots) and what i wear (dolce and gabbana, bitches!). they want to know my intimate thoughts, the sordid details of my escapades (it's lucky juju can't read!), my advice for getting poop out of cloth diapers. it is a heavy burden, but somebody's got to bear it!

enjoying a coffee after much art-making.

after we finished taking pictures, we went to the cafe for refreshments. the security guard was right, everyone was stopping to stare and whispering about me. at one point a small mob of paparrazi gathered to take my picture. eat your heart out, paris hilton!

so stay tuned, there's lots more baby to come!

xoxo. baby.